Monday, February 28, 2011


Dear stupid Provo pedestrian:

There is a very limited list of things you can do while you are crossing the street:

- You can walk (I suggest this)
- You can run (not if it's icy)
- You can talk (I do this all the time)
- You can sing (but only if it's musical theater, and you need to sing it as loudly and nasally as possible)
- You can caper about and gesticulate wildly, if that's your thing (but only if you don't mind getting stared at)

Notice how the foregoing list does NOT include stopping in the middle and tying your shoe. That is NOT good idea. Don't do it. Especially if my roommate is barreling down the street toward you. He drives fast. You're a stationary target. Don't do it!


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