Tuesday, February 21, 2012

SPECIAL GLARES

I have a wide variety of special glares that I use on a variety of occasions.  The aim with these glares is to convey an entire sentence to the person glared at, such as:

"That's my water glass; yours is on your left, genius."

"You're preaching false doctrine from the pulpit."

"I saw you trying to cut in line."

"Don't even think about talking to me all the way to Sandy."

and my personal favorite,

"If you say one more word during this concert, I will reach behind me and rip your throat out."

Then there was the one I did the other day on the TRAX platform, at 6:25 in the morning, that said:

SIR, IF YOU DO NOT UNLOCK THIS TRAIN DOOR RIGHT NOW YOU WILL FOREVER REGRET THE DAY YOU GOT HIRED AT UTA.

At Murray Central, Blue Line train drivers have to get off for just a few seconds and dial in their route (my understanding is that they have to do this to ensure the track is lined up for them to go to Sandy, not Daybreak).  While the driver got out to dial in his route, he caught sight of me glaring at him.  We made eye contact, and I felt him jump a little bit, even from the opposite end of the platform.  When he got back on the train, the doors unlocked immediately.

4 comments:

  1. I was just wondering about why operators have to step out and switch the track themselves ("Dial U6 for West Valley," and whatnot). If I remember correctly, when the Red and Green line extensions opened in August there were no such manual switches. Hmm.

    On an unrelated note, have you seen any new '12 buses rolling around? A few observations:
    - The windows are not tinted (yet?). Looks pretty cool at night, on account of how illuminated the inside looks.
    - The rear signals act '11-ski-bus-esque, but the front signals don't.
    - The buses look so good without garish advertising wraps. Right now, no advertising has been placed on '12 buses. I'm okay with the standard rectangular ads on the sides below windows, but seeing an unadvertised bus makes my heart swell.
    - Haven't been inside a '12 yet, but from what I can gather it looks the exact same as an '11.
    - Six years that the UTA has been ordering buses with similar specs. I like these Gilligs, but isn't it time we get something a little less... prone to rattle?

    Humbly yours,
    Garrett

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  2. I've been thinking about '12 buses myself (see today's post). I've ridden one so far. There was one difference between a '12 and a '10 that I saw, but I'll let you discover it for yourself . . .

    As for the track-switching bit, I confess I have no idea why train operators have to step outside to dial in their routes, or why they may not have had to do this in the past. I guess I'm not the train ninja quite yet. But if I find out, I'll be sure to share.

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  3. Okay, so I've been trying to leave this comment for days but it hasn't been working out. It may be a problem with OpenID, or maybe Blogspot, or maybe Firefox. Anyway.

    I'm eagerly awaiting the moment the 209 that happens to come by is the 12006 that runs along the route. We'll see tomorrow! I surmise that the difference between the '12 and '10 buses is apparent in the interior, correct?

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  4. You should be able to see it as soon as you walk down the aisle. There may be other differences, but I've still only ridden one '12 to date.

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