Wednesday, August 29, 2012


Dear stupid Provo pedestrian:

I suppose I can forgive you, even though I don't wanna, for crossing the street at the wrong time.  Some crosswalk signals are longer than others, and sometimes the flashing hand means you have plenty of time, and sometimes it means you'd better get your rear in gear and get across that lonely stretch of asphalt as quick as the wind may carry you.  Just for future reference, though, if you only start crossing during green walking man times, you will never have the need to be carried by the wind across an urban crosswalk.

Now, when the light turned red and the cars started revving their engines and you didn't start hurrying, that was definitely a mistake.  And yes, it was stupid of the guy waiting at the light to honk at you and say mean things out his window at you.  I wholeheartedly agree with you that the fact that he is technically right does not give him the right to be rude to you.

but don't stand there arguing with him in the middle of the street while cars are coming at you from the other direction

The next time you feel a good, old-fashioned argue coming on, go home and post something blatantly false on a YouTube (R) comment string.  In a few hours, you'll have more people to argue with than you've ever had before.  Sorry for the swears, but they are contextually accurate . . .
Do that, and there might be a next time.  Argue with people in the middle of a busy street, and there might not be.


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