Monday, December 8, 2014

CONGRATULATIONS

Recently BYU announced an extremely wise decision: next school year they will charge for parking and offer bus shuttles for free. Having observed, and fought over, the parking situation during my extensive BYU career, and having earned a master's degree in transportation engineering during that time, I feel I can speak with authority when I say to BYU:

WELCOME BACK TO 2003

It has taken you eleven years to even get approximately close to what you already had when I was a freshman. You want a cookie?

Though the Ryde STILL won't take you anywhere outside of the bubble, unless I am very much mistaken.

As I've mentioned before, I've nothing in particular against the Ryde (except, perhaps, their sophomoric advertising--but then they are a college shuttle service, I suppose); I'm just annoyed that it took so long for the BYU administration to learn by hard experience at the students' expense.

(Oh, and BYU students who are whining to high heaven about paying for parking: suck it up. $60 per semester doesn't even begin to approximate how much money BYU is spending on maintaining each parking space. Be warned--you've potentially provided me with an abundance of "treasures" to share in the coming days.)

Oh, and UTA:


It might be time to end this one-sided relationship and put that service somewhere else--oh and I have so many suggestions for what you can do instead . . .

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

TREASURES FROM THE INTERNET (10)

This first one is rather clever.


  • Makes me a little sad when people want the transit system to go further than it does. For the record, I'd be the first one behind a cross-country rapid rail network if I thought it were remotely financially feasible. For now I guess I'll have to stick to walking into a room and quietly asking "Night service? Weekends?"
  • Because that's clearly working so well.
This next sentiment crops up from time to time, though it has calmed down a bit since last year or the year before:

  • A "cold, uncomfortable Gillig?" You mean the cold, uncomfortable Gillig I ride to work every day?
  • (Thank you, by the way, for using commas between adjectives)
  • "20+" seems awfully generous based on the number of people I have ever seen on a 454. Granted, I've never actually taken the 454 to Grantsville, but unless there's a great mancha of you getting on at the airport, I'm skeptical.
  • And anyway, those getting on at the airport won't have even the coldest of uncomfortable rides for "30+ mi./1 hr."
  • Even if it is 20+ on all the days I don't see a 454, that's hardly enough to warrant an MCI, since you all basically would get your own seat on a Gillig anyway. Just be grateful you don't get an Optima. Or a flex bus.
  • I used to ride a cold, uncomfortable 811 down the freeway from Orem to Sandy with 70+ people on it. I know, it doesn't seem possible. But, back in the day, there was one UTA route that actually was overcrowded. And I was on it. People sat in each other's laps; people stood in the gaps between seats when other people were sitting in both seats; people had to get off the bus to let others off, then scurry back on before the door closed and the bus pulled away. I think those people could complain about not having an MCI and be justified.
  • I know, I keep forgetting, you're special. Someday I'll remember that on my own before you have to remind me.

Our favorite reporter is always a good source for treasures:

  • The TRAX stop where now?
  • Did UTA sneak in another station on the Draper Line without telling me? The nerve. Clearly, you have the inside track on all things UTA, since you know things even I don't.
  • Or is this just a typo? 'Cause I can't wait to see what other articles it gets copy-pasted into.
This last one is not about transit, but it gave me a healthy, soul-healing laugh. In the midst of a heated debate over whether Mormons practice polygamy or not, someone introduced some new terminology:


(I cut off the last sentence, but you don't really need to know what it said, do you, really?)

  •  Convenient is not a noun, that I'm aware of . . . enlighten me: what is a convenient?
  • "Clearly," you are the authority on all Mormon doctrine. I've been going to the wrong source for Sunday School all these years.
  • But seriously, thanks for the laugh. I've not laughed that hard about an angsty online comment for a long time.
 Have an excellent Wednesday!